Denial or To Believe

The Idea: 
One of the greatest mysteries to all mankind is the divine existence. Sometimes some say its a convenient rationale, while some swear to have discovered Him. Sometimes we like to challenge ourselves and our beliefs and want to discover the truth on our own.

The Conclusion:
We all live by a belief system, our conclusion on our journey of discovering the Great One will more than likely always be the same as our beginning. 

Denial or To Believe

I’d like to look for Him…

I’d like to embark on a journey of discovery…

I want to investigate and be certain…

That He is not a mere invention.

Like all intense investigations…

My process too starts with assumptions.

It then moves on to following instincts…

Until I reach the point of deriving my deductions.

I see a whole trail of clues…

Pointing towards Him.

I am not sure yet though…

Is it a setup…or is it circumstantially true.

I sit back for a while and ponder,

Am I just being a rigid skeptic?

For even science lays down a hypothesis –

Then tallies the statistics,

Then proceeds with eliminations,

And if not enough evidence to prove otherwise,

Declares the hypothesis as a factual conclusion.

There are fewer reasons to deny His presence then not,

And more unexplained stories to be understood by His existence.

There are more miracles than we learn about in history

Which happen every moment without the applause.

I feel sometimes like the audience watching an act…

So cynical about the technicalities without even knowing the technique.

 Commenting & complaining about the plot…

Only to be surprised at the end.

But then I am back to my exploration…

I need to see Him to believe.

I realize that my investigation can also conclude…

Only when my act reaches its climax.

It is irrational to assume all the human interactions

Are nothing but coincidental.

It is sheer silly to look upon all creation

As nothing but incidental.

All is not just chaos…

All is not just evolution…

Everything is consequential…

Every life out there is the proof.

I throw my hands up and give up…

I bend my knees and conclude…

I join my hands and look up into nothing…

I know now…I cannot embark upon a journey of discovery.

To discover Him, I need to understand Him…

And to do that…I need to Believe.

Identity Crisis

The Idea: 

We live in a society where there are so many different people,different personalities, different perspectives. We like to think of ourselves as individuals; we like to think that we make our own choices.

The Conclusion:

Life is rarely a matter of your individual and independent ideologies. Under these circumstances, identity really loses its meaning.

Identity Crisis

So many faces,

So many lives behind those faces.

So many emotions

So many motives  behind those emotions.

Boundaries....and constrictions

Is society spelt the right way?

Conformities and compliance

Is freedom spelt the right way?

Is there a real choice

Behind the paths we take up?

Is there a true goal

At the end of this journey?

Are we truly independent?

Are we truly making our own decisions?

Influences surround us....

Guilt always crowds us.

Integration and assimilation

Is identity spelt the right way?

...And then there was silence

The Idea:
They say silence can be so loud that it could make you go deaf. The departure of someone special from your life leaves you with that kind of deafening silence. 

The Conclusion:
Not all wounds can heal with time and not all attempts at getting that someone special back in your life yield successful results. Sometimes you just have to wait till the end, until you become one with that silence.

…And then there was silence

The distant waves went silent,

The crowded streets went mute,

The muzzling of the leaves outside…

The soft crunching of the mud below my feet.

It was a defining moment…that one,

When silence came screaming to me! (draining out all other sounds around)

I stared into the emptiness,

For the remains of your impression,

I tried to search the wind around me

For the residues of your scent.

I felt every part of me, (felt: refers to physically feeling with hands)

For any signs of your touch.

I moved my lips but could not utter,

There were no thoughts left behind my words.

You took away…the broken pieces, 

Was left with nothing to mend… (all attempts would be futile)

Those shattered glasses…were swept away too, (complete emptiness and vacuum)

There was no place to settle… even for the dust.

And time will heal…

And time will heal…

I said to myself.

I cried, I wept,

All time did was ticked away in the stillness… (re-affirming the silence)

Until one last time…all just went silent.

In a Moment...is Life

The Idea:
Life is a collection of memories...memories made up of moments that we may cherish or moment that we may look down upon. It is our perpetual wish to be able to relive those cherished times, or to travel back in time and right the wrongs.

The Conclusion:
Life offers every moment only once and this is the basis of each human life being so unique and of a variety. What we do and how we do comes down to how we execute our plans and how we react in that brief interval which we call moment. And that in my opinion, is the basic unit of life.

In a Moment… Is Life.

It’s gone...

All that is left is a memory.

Memory of a moment

That was once alive.

Call it the beauty...

Or call it the flaw…

But isn’t this the very…

Essence of being alive?

Every moment that we plan for...

Every moment that we anticipate…

Every moment that we pack with as many thrills that we can…

Every moment… that makes us look forward to being alive.

When I turn around and look back…

It’s a whole collage –

Of distinct colors…of distinct faces; 

Of distinct sounds…of distinct voices; 

Of distinct touches…of distinct feelings; 

The more I look…the vibrant it gets!

I think to myself…what if –

What if I could rewind…

What if I could play it all back…

What if I could relive each moment…

What if I could patch the mistakes?

But the true beauty lies in the chaos –

The randomness that all the moments create…

Each moment can only be created once…

Making our life… a masterpiece. 

But “Its just a moment…” and nothing more…

A brief interval between now… and then.

But sometimes it is all that there is,

Between not being and being alive.

An Artist Illusion

The Idea:

You know sometimes in life there are times when you feel that if you had more control over your life...you could probably have done a better job at moulding it than the powers Above. You think to yourself how you would have chosen the best and how you could have ensured everything to be just right.

The conclusion:

In the end you realize that there is no perfect life....life just happens anyways...and life unfolds in the best possible manner that it can...without your knowledge or control or understanding. 

An Artist Illusion

I am not an artiste…
But if I were…
I would paint my life.

I would fill the canvas…
Pick the best palette… (palette of colors)
Each stroke would be a masterstroke.

My brushes would be of a variety…
Never wanting to run short…
I would give each color the perfect weight. (thickness of a stroke/line)

I think I’d give my life…
A glossy finish once prepared…
I want my painting, to last forever.

Should there be a frame…?
I think maybe not…
My vision should remain unrestrained.

I got my thoughts…all in place…
Now I pick up my brush…
The perfect life…will now be sketched.

The tip of my brush, now dipped in color…
Touches the canvas…but I stop…
Perfection deserves a bit of reflection. (referring to thought/thinking)

Its been since… a while…
The dot has not spread…
My flawless life is yet to begin.

My life…it turns out…
Has all the colors already…
Just… my eyes are in pursuit of the pattern.

 I am not the artiste…
That I imagined to be…
Yet my life had been… painted…already.